Photo: CreativeWeirdo
The great minds of our society have developed some amazing things yet, the well-endowed women of the world still struggle to find good bras. For the love of God they’ve created magnetic eyelash extensions, but I still can’t find a bra in my size that will enable me to wear a backless dress. Priorities people! Don’t even get me started on the designers who are committed to creating things that can only be worn if you’re willing to free the nipple. Why is every top and dress backless? Why? Because the fight to find great bras continues, a lot of women ask me where I shop. I stick to a select few brands, because my bra size is so random and uncommon, but I wanted to venture out and try some new ones to tell people about.
Photo: Creative Weirdo
The end of Summer is fast approaching, and I have to say that mine was rather productive, so I’m not too messed up about Fall’s arrival. I did a little traveling, a little partying, and a little work (starting the podcast which I hope you’ve subscribed to and downloaded). I finally turned 30, which I’ve been looking forward to since I was 25, and it’s been very fulfilling thus far. I feel more confident even in the uncertainties, and I feel myself loving me more and more everyday. That’s something I thought I’d never fully be able to do. Today, I want to pay homage to one garment that got me through this season of galavanting and growth in comfort and style.
Photo: Mackenzie Amanda
Photo: Tre Thomas
Let’s talk white pants. Some people still live by the “fashion rule” that you don’t wear white after Labor Day, or before Easter. I do not submit to such restrictions, because the first rule of fashion (as far as I’m concerned) is that there are no rules. With that being said, I like a good white pant all year long, but they are mostly a warm weather staple. The trouble with white pants is that they tend to be translucent, especially if the fabric is thin. This is especially the case for white linen pants (another warm weather staple). Some women like to solve this problem by risking it all and going commando, some people wear a thong, and some people just disrespect the hell out of all of us and wear a full on black or nude brief. So every spring/summer, at every all-white party, it looks like trashier version of the Victoria’s Secret fashion show. Newsflash boo boo, we can all see your underwear. I’m not sure if people know and don’t care, or are somehow oblivious to the many stares they’re receiving. Don’t be that person showing up to your family reunion, upsetting the aunties with your underwear showing. There has to be a better way (infomercial voice)!
Photo: Tre Thomas
Have you noticed that it is equally as difficult to find boyfriend jeans that fit as it is to find an actual boyfriend that fits? I can’t tell if the irony there is beautiful or tragic. If for some reason you are not familiar with the concept, boyfriend jeans are so named, because they should fit like the jeans you might borrow from your boyfriend: loose, relaxed fit, a little distressed, cuffed at the bottom. I first became obsessed with them via Kim Kardashian B.K. (before Kanye). I couldn’t figure out for the life of me how she found jeans with the right fit given the size of her butt. Well it’s because her thighs are not as big as her butt (no tea no shade).
Photo: Tre Thomas
When you have a big butt, and big thighs, a man’s jeans won’t really fit you the way boyfriend jeans theoretically should. Hell, even if you are a man with a big butt and big thighs a lot of men’s pants won’t fit you. I learned this one day when I was working at Ted Baker in the men’s suiting department, and a fine ass white dude who was a former football player couldn’t fit our pants. Apparently it’s a problem for a lot of guys with that kind of athletic build. Who knew dudes had those kinds of problems? But enough about them, we have our own problems. Am I right ladies?
Anyway. I set out on a year’s long journey to find actual boyfriend jeans that fit. I cannot tell you how many pairs I tried on that just made me look insane. They were huge in the waist, super fitted in the butt and thighs, and way too long to be cuffed. This was one of the great tragedies of my life. Excuse me as I weep. Well, I am happy to say I finally found a pair at Uniqlo. If you’re curvy, you’re going to have to accept that you’ll need to get these altered in the waist. There’s no way they can have the loose fit you want without also creating a huge gap in the waist. I; however, didn’t have time to get the waist taken in on these, so I paired them with this slouchy over-sized sweater to hide the gap. I do not recommend wearing flats with these as you’ll need the extra height to not look frumpy. I’ve seen it done with sneakers, but it’s not really a favorite look of mine. Because they’re relaxed and loose, I like to femme the look up with a heel.
Photo: Tre Thomas
Let’s Review:
Any questions?
Photo: Tre Thomas
Photo: Tre Thomas
Photo: Tre Thomas
Given the state of social unrest in our country, it is only fitting that I wore a Mod look reminiscent of British-bred 60’s counter culture. If you have no idea what I’m talking about think Twiggy and Mary Quant. While some were embracing the refined style of then First Lady Jackie Onassis, across the pond suburban teens were wearing mini skirts, shift dresses and cropped hair. Hence why many refer to Mod and hippie clothing of the 60’s as sub culture or counter culture fashion. I have always loved Mod 60’s fashion, especially when it made a resurgence in the 90’s via Cher Horowitz and the Olsen twins. As an adult; however, I didn’t really think I could pull off a shift dress look. Shift dresses have no defined waist, and given my unrelenting fear of looking pregnant, I try to stay away from them. Even if I choose to indulge in a dress that has no waist, I belt it to create one. I said all of that to say, this was my definition of taking a fashion risk, and it was okay. I’m still not confident I don’t look like I need to stop by Planned Parenthood, but hey I tried. And for under $20 (Zara end of season sale comes through once again) what’s the worst that could happen?
Photo: Tre Thomas
I am obsessed with layering. This is partly out of necessity, because I have a 9 to 5 job in a very conservative corporate environment, in addition to my 5 to 9 job in media. This means I am likely running to cover an event right after work, and I need to be able to go from conservative Jessica to Not Carrie Bradshaw Jessica quickly (although the two are not vastly different). Adding or taking away a layer helps me to avoid carrying a large suitcase around the crowded streets of New York to do a Diana Ross level wardrobe change.
Photo: Tre Thomas
Recent Comments