A few weeks ago I had the pleasure of attending my favorite beauty event of the year, the Essence Best in Beauty Awards held at the Sugar Factory in the Meatpacking District.  There is just something about being in a room of women who look like you, and have a shared experience that gives you a sense of belonging and normalcy.  This isn’t something I get to experience at my 9-5.  This year’s panel discussion was hosted by Essence Magazine’s Beauty Editor, Julee Wilson with Vanessa Simmons and Zonnique Harris.  While I enjoyed the conversation, and the lite bites, I have to admit the gift bags are a major incentive to attend.  They literally give you the best in black beauty products.  My favorite thus far is the Colgate Optic White toothpaste (I am convinced that, that paired with my activated charcoal are making my teeth whiter).  I am also obsessed with mascaras, and I have tried many, but Essence really put me on game with COVERGRIRL So Lashy! Blastpro Mascara.


Photo: Terrence Jennings

Photo: Terrence Jennings


Photo: Terrence Jennings

Photo: Terrence Jennings

Following a recent doctor’s visit, I’ve been feeling more inclined to work out, and eat better.  I go through these phases wherein I feel amped about having a healthier lifestyle, and after two or three weeks, I’ll just give up.  This time feels a little different, because I’ve been looking at doing those things from the perspective of wanting to feel better mentally and physically, as opposed to just wanting to look better.  Here’s the thing though.  I’ve been trying the treadmill interval training where you sprint for a short period, and then jog or walk to recover, and then sprint again, so on and so forth. Apparently sprinting is the key to weight loss.  That shit is hard when you’re out of shape, so it’s been a real test of me being patient with myself as I build endurance, but also pushing myself (there’s a sermon in there somewhere).  Whenever I’m on a treadmill next to a white girl, I always feel this extra need to be better at running than her.  I’m not sure what it is, but for me it’s an unspoken competition in my mind that I have to run faster and longer than her.  I think that whole black parenting conditioning thing where they tell us we have to be twice as good has rolled over into my workout life.  I have seriously considered pushing one of them over.  Pray for me.


Beyoncé is setting the bar way too high for maternity beauty and fashion.  I don’t have faith in my ability to look like anything other than an amorphous blob who demands to be fed every hour when and if I get pregnant.  It just doesn’t seem doable for me.  Pipe down Mrs. Knowles-Carter.


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I felt the urge to listen to some old Tamia last night, and after battling the urge to do a wall slide in my shower, I thought about the fact that we do not honor Queen Tamia enough.  Not only for her timeless music, and sultry voice, but I love her and her husband Grant Hill.  Their marriage is the kind of goals I can really get behind.  The videos of him playing the piano, while she sings just gives me hope that not all marriages are trash.  In all honesty I don’t think I could handle the level of scrutiny that comes with a Jay Z and Beyoncé, Michelle and Obama, or even John and Chrissy marriage.  Tamia and Grant Hill have the ideal balance between anonymity and notoriety.  Just enough people know them for them to be relevant, but they aren’t being picked apart in the media every other day.  They emerge every now and again to give you a cute couple slay, and they move on with their lives.  Also, I have to admonish you to watch the video for Officially Missing You.  There were some fine ass dudes in that video, and also her legs motivated me to go really hard in the gym this week.  Which is why my hamstrings are currently on fire.

Am I the only person who has a hard time with the fictionalization of sex scenes in movies and shows?  This whole thing of getting up after having had sex and just going out into the world sans a post coital shower just wears me down.  Or are people really out here in the world doing that?  Am I crazy?  Would it alter the story line that much to cut to a shower?  Can they imply it somewhere somehow?


I hypothesize that there is a strong correlation between unattractive people and misogyny, wherein the more unattractive you are, the more likely you are to hold sexist beliefs about women.  I think it’s because if you are better looking, people have probably been nicer to you, so you don’t blame women for all of your problems.  I would really like to secure some manner of funding to research this.