After a weekend spent with friends trying to reassure myself that I’m not a complete idiot and that I can in fact learn my job and be good at it, Monday rolled around. I woke up that morning, read some affirmations and scriptures on being encouraged and said a prayer. (I wake up every morning, and have a long chat with God as I’m getting dressed.) I put on one of my absolute favorite black dresses, did my hair and makeup and bundled up to weather the cold both figuratively and literally.
As soon as I stepped into the building I felt an air of doom loom over me. I sent my manager an email outlining all of her concerns and how we could fix them. She responded by giving me a project that I definitely needed help completing. My “training mentor” reluctantly answered a few of my questions. Side note: don’t trust a girl that doesn’t do her hair. I will spare you the details, but this turned out to be one of the worse days of my life for a few reasons. Or maybe I’m not sparing the details, whatever.
- No one would actually answer my questions the whole day.
- I had a cross functional team meeting that I had no idea how to prepare for. They ended up having said meeting without me unbeknownst to me.
- I had a mild panic attack and sat in the bathroom for like 15 minutes trying to calm myself down.
- I couldn’t eat, which is really saying something because I love to eat.
- At the end of the day my manager called me in to her office and recited every question I had asked every person in the office that entire day. They apparently had a secret meeting where they told her how much I sucked. I was told that my questions were inappropriate for someone in their fifth week on the job.
- The guy I thought I was talking to got completely ghost on me and hadn’t returned a single text or phone call the entire weekend and this continued for a week. Why can’t guys just tell you when they’ve met a girl over the weekend with better edges and bigger booty? Why?
- My manager gave me four projects to do by the end of the week, but there was no way I could do them without any help. And clearly no one in the department is willing to help me especially without snitching on me.
I went home that night a complete and total wreck. Did I mention that the door to my place was frozen shut and I had to wait 30 minutes for my roommate to come back and let me in? It was cold to say the very least.
I finally got in the house, showered, couldn’t eat, and went to bed with still no word from old dude.
Just as an aside I feel I should let you know that I truly despise cats, but this gif was fitting so there it is. I do not have a cat, nor will I ever. They give me the creeps and I refuse to fulfill certain stereotypes about single women and cats.