One of my many duties as the resident fashion girl in the life of my friends is to advise my guy friends on gifts for their boo’s.  This past Christmas my dear friend picked out an amazing pair of booties for his girlfriend that were pre-season (AKA hella expensive).  He wanted to get her a bag as well, but since he spent so much on the shoes, he didn’t think he could find one worth having for under a stack (that’s $1,000 for the aunties out there).  That’s where I come in.  When you think of good handbags your mind automatically goes to the designers whose brands are synonymous with leather goods (or the ones you’ve heard a hundred times in various rap songs): Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Céline, Prada, Fendi etc.  God knows you girls love your Neverfull’s but there’s so much more to handbags than the names you hear most often.

Don’t get me wrong, I think some of those bags are great aspirational pieces, but you don’t have to go out and spend your whole tax refund check to have a nice handbag.  Let’s be real.  My most sincere hope is that you guys will use those refunds wisely, but also treat yourself to a little something.  Let’s review a few designers that have great options for under $1,000.

My name is Jessica, I am 29 years old, and I did not own lingerie or actual pajamas.  A few weeks ago a friend told me with extreme judgement and a dash of disappointment that this makes me weird.  Before you join said friend in judgment, hear me out.  I don’t know if you’ve gathered as much from my site, but I don’t get enough action to have need of lingerie.  My phone gets less play than a Tyga album, so who the hell am I wearing it for?!  Also, my bra size is rather uncommon, so even the most basic of bras cost a ridiculous amount of money.  So you see why I am not sold on the idea of buying bras for leisure, which would cost even more (we’re talking triple digits boo).  Lastly, what are all of my random t-shirts collected over the years for if not for me to lounge around and sleep in them?

So I asked some single female friends who also get little to no action what their lingerie collection is looking like, and they too judged me.  I also asked some friends who are married, or are soon to be married, and we all agreed a grown ass woman should have what I am calling a “private wardrobe.” As of late, I’ve been adding to this wardrobe, so let me give you some tips on how and where to start.

Photo: Tre Thomas

You know how you watch Love and Hip Hop Atlanta, or Basketball Wives LA (don’t sit here and act like you don’t, I know you) and the actors are wearing bodycon dresses, Fashion Nova sets, and Ru Paul level makeup contouring at 10 AM? I hate that shit. It begs the question, why? I will admit that it has always been easier for me to dress up than to dress down. Maybe it’s my southern upbringing, or my shady ass grandmother, but I do not like to leave the house without looking put together; however, it’s beyond unnecessary to look like an Instagram model at all times. I personally do not enjoy looking like I’m trying to catch the attention of a local rapper, or reality star, but if that’s your thing then you wear that smokey eye and red lip at noon sis, but this post probably isn’t for you. If that’s not you, then follow me. There is a such thing as an effortless slay. It’s the happy medium betwixt dressy and casual, whereby you look polished but not pressed, and I promise it’s really easy.

“Across cultures darker people suffer more. Why?” Remember when Andre 300 wore a jumpsuit baring those words during his Lollapalooza set in 2014, and everyone went crazy? Everyone except those of us who have been paying attention to life, because we knew that. The normalization of fairer skin is so pervasive that darker women of color can’t even buy the correct underwear. That’s right. Underwear. Every woman should have nude colored things in her wardrobe: nude pumps, nude bras, nude underwear, and nude body shapers. Say you want to wear a white shirt, or a very trendy sheer skirt. Yet, the color nude never seems to be nude for us. It’s most often a beige, with undertones that aren’t a match for those of us with more melanin. We quite often experience this lack of color when looking for makeup as well. I don’t even bother to try foundation from newer brands, because it takes them a while to figure out how to get our skin tones right. You’re out here trying to give your best beat, yet you actually look like a Gross sister.

Fortunately, some companies have taken notice of the fact that all nude underwear is not equal. Click through the gallery for some companies that have nude undergarments for all shades.

As much as I love a good party, I find my office Holiday party to be so stressful.  I have a strict rule about not drinking with co-workers, because some white people tend to get way too damn comfortable at social functions when they’ve been drinking.  All of a sudden they start sounding a little…Trumpy, and want to know how your hair feels.  So then I feel compelled to drink from the top shelf open bar, because how else am I supposed to get through that?  Hence, I focus my energy on deciding what to wear, and just hoping for best with everything else.

Photo: Tre Thomas

This past weekend I had the pleasure of testing out Rent the Runway’s Style Studio in SOHO, and it was delightful.  Rent the Runway speaks to my soul as a fashion enthusiast who has neither a Sugar Daddy, nor a rich regular dad, nor a 6 figure salary (yet).  This innovative brand combines luxury fashion with technology to make quality clothing accessible to a larger number of consumers (albeit for a brief rental period).  The process of renting the runway is quite simple:

This week in fashion…

A photo posted by Chanel Iman (@chaneliman) on Nov 15, 2016 at 9:52am PST

Chanel Iman shut it down in this metallic silver gown by Kaufman Franco at the Glamour Magazine Women of the Year Awards. Metallics aren’t only for New Years, baby showers (for some reason) or red carpets. You can always add some sparkle to your look with a metallic skirt or shoes. I personally love metallic gold sneakers.

Photo: Tre Thomas

Let me preface this post by saying a few things. If you are healthy and happy with your weight, then great for you. This is not for you. This post is for those of us who want to drop a few pounds, and need to know what to wear while we are transitioning to healthier version of ourselves. I like being curvy. I do not like being overweight, and that I am according to both my doctor, and my pants. If you at any time feel that I am fat shaming, then send me an email and we can talk about it.

So now that we have that out of the way, I want to know if you’ve heard the good news about what to wear when you’ve gained weight, and haven’t figured out which lifestyle change is best for you. Lean in real close. The secret is this: buy bigger clothes. I don’t mean go all 90’s era rapper. I mean buy clothes that actually fit you. First and foremost you’ll be much more comfortable in clothes that fit as opposed to the ones you’ve squeezed yourself into. I remember seeing photos of myself on social and thinking hmmm I look a little bit like a tufted couch from Z Gallerie.

Photography: Tre Thomas

So, Fall finally showed up. A lot of people find Fall very draining to dress for, because you are dressing for two different temperatures in one day. Most likely it’s freezing in the morning when you leave your house for work, and by the time you head out for lunch, it’s hot. This is why it’s important to step up your layering game. You just add and take away layers as the temperature changes throughout the day (more on this in a later post). An essential layering piece for the season is a leather jacket. You’re welcome to get a faux leather jacket, but for the love of God please don’t choose faux leather that looks like a trash bag. Unless you want to look like Missy Elliot circa 1997. In which case, go right on ahead. You should also choose a leather jacket that is sufficiently lined. We like to dress for both function and fashion over here, so please don’t waste your money on a thin leather jacket that you’ll only be able to wear twice. Real or fake, a good leather jacket should have some weight to it so you don’t freeze when the sun goes down.  I also love to layer a fur vest over my leather jacket.  Fur and leather together is almost always a good idea. Here are some tips for buying a good faux leather jacket if that’s the route you want to take.

A photo posted by Rasheeda (@rasheedadabosschick) on Oct 18, 2016 at 6:50pm PDT

I have been style crushing on Rasheeda Frost (of Love and Hip Hop Atlanta) for a while now. I love anyone who can mix the high end with the low end, and she does so flawlessly. There’s something very alluring about a person who isn’t dressed in one designer from head to toe. I find that very lazy for some reason, especially when that designer has not cosigned you as their muse. For example, it makes perfect sense for Rihanna to wear Dior from head to toe, because she is the face of Dior, and I can only assume they are footing the bill for her looks. I am still annoyed; however, that Young Dro professes his affinity for Ralph Lauren often, yet Ralph will never acknowledge his existence. Rasheeda wears pieces from her own store Pressed, and pairs them with designer pieces. I have not visited her store, so I cannot attest to the quality of her products, but I love her Instagram style posts. I typically find the whole “I’m really into fashion” story line on reality television very played out. Every season of every reality show you can count on someone having a trash ass “clothing line” or opening a poor excuse for a boutique. Can we credit Sheree Whitfield as the pioneer of this now common farce? I can buy into Rasheeda’s plot line though, because the proof is in the post.