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Power: The Gift And The Curse

April 8, 2016 by Jessica Wilkins No Comments

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In case you can’t tell I am quite the  Beyoncé FAN. I want to make it clear that I am a fan and not a Stan, because those people freak me out. Stans treat their stars as if they are perfect beings who are beyond reproach, and that honor I cannot bestow upon anyone, but my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (she said with a deep Southern accent). Now that, that’s out of the way we can get to the point. When Elle released the interview that accompanied their  Beyoncé issue I was eager to read it. She has mastered the art of being a ubiquitous global icon, and moving with stealth-like anonymity at the same damn time. The woman keeps her personal life just that: personal. Yet, I still read her interviews because in the midst of her standard answers to cliche questions, she drops gems that resonate with exactly where I am in life. She was posed with the question: How do you feel about the role of business-woman, running your own company? Her answer almost jumped off the page at me.

“It’s exciting, but having the power to make every final decision and being accountable for them is definitely a burden and a blessing.”

We are a generation of entrepreneurs. Just scroll through your Instagram if you need proof.  We love the idea of owning our own business because we want to be our own boss. We want to wake up whenever, do whatever, call the shots, and have to answer to no one. That sounds like a sweet deal until you realize that the power to do those things also means that your success or failure lies solely on you. If you don’t make yourself wake up on time, set a schedule, manage it, come up with the ideas, and implement them, then that failure really all falls on you. I want so badly for my writing to reach other people and to resonate with people I don’t even know. The responsibility to get my material to those people is mine.

As I look over my notebooks that are crowded with lots of little notes and ideas and things to talk over with my blogging consultant, my mind races. I am both thrilled and anxious at the same time. I have the power to make these decisions…to say what my brand should look like, what I want to communicate, what my strategy is, how I’ll execute it, etc. With that power comes the knowledge that no one else can wake up and do what I do for me.  If I don’t do it, then I will fail.  That’s scary.  And then I hear the voices of naysayers in my head. “You should change your logo.” “You need to rethink the name of the site.” “Why would anyone listen to what you have to say about fashion? Your style is boring. You dress like a cute secretary.” (Can you believe that bitch? I am basically a full time secretary jack ass.)

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I know hope people mean well, but those things stay in the back of my mind and feed the fear of failure that dwells back there as well.

I have the power to create the life and the career that I want. I have the power to take care of and protect myself and my energy. We all do.  We all have more power than we realize and on some level we know that, that power comes with great responsibility.  Question is: how do we tap into it without feeling overwhelmed by it?

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I think the key to it is to focus.  With greater opportunities come greater responsibilities, and your priorities have to change in order to stay focused.  When I was feeling like a Meek Mill diss track last week I watched a sermon about this very thing.  “We can’t go into new places in life with the same old habits.”  You can pray for greater but when greater comes, you have to become greater as well, and that means focusing even harder on the goal.  Distractions from the periphery of life will come, but you have to zoom in and crop that out like you’re the only cute one in a group pic.  Find your power.  Tap into it.  Protect it like it’s a limited edition Alaia dress.  And focus.

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